Impact Wrestling Results
November 15, 2018
— The show opens with footage of Johnny Impact retaining the world title over Killer Kross last Thursday night, as well as a recap of the fall of Eddie Edwards. Josh Matthews and Don Callis welcome us to Sam’s Town Casino in Las Vegas as we head to the ring for
TESSA BLANCHARD vs. RAY LYN
Blanchard dominated early, at one point doing reps with her opponent while she had her up in a military press. Lyn fired back with a knee strike in the corner followed by a dropkick and a snap hurricanrana. She went for a tilt-a-whirl headscissors but Blanchard simply threw her to the mat and began stalking her prey with boots to the head. A powerbomb finds its mark into the corner followed by a nasty looking Buzzsaw DDT for a relatively easy victory.
Winner: Tessa Blanchard
— Blanchard got on the microphone and called out Taya Valkyrie for all the trash talking and name-calling she’s been doing. She said beyond all that the truth is simply that she is the Knockouts Champion, and Taya will never be anything more than Johnny Impact’s wife. Taya stormed out to the ring, but Blanchard wisely snuck away before the two could fight. Taya said she was proud to be Johnny’s wife and called herself the queen of lucha libre. It’s official — the two will fight for the Knockouts title on 1/6 at Impact Homecoming.
— Dezmond Xavier, Zachary Wentz and Trey Miguel were shown in a That 70s Show style vignette hyping their arrival as a group. They kept giggling and couldn’t stop laughing, as smoke clouds swirled all around them and canned sitcom laughter played over their jokes. So basically The Rascalz new gimmick is that they’re a bunch of stoners. I love it.
LAX (w/ Konnan) vs. KM & FALLAH BAHH
Bahh started things out against Santana, mocking the LAX gang signs while the much smaller champion tried everything in the book just to take him off his feet, or do literally anything to damage the big man. Santana got frustrated and ran into a series of snap arm drags, which I think surprised everyone. It took both the champions to toss him out of the ring, but Bahh came right back and nailed each guy with an enzuigiri, before tagging in his partner.
KM came in and tried to do Bahh’s steamroller move, but it’s a lot less effective when you don’t weight 400 pounds. Ortiz nailed him with a snap DDT and Santana followed with a dropkick to the back of the neck, and a running senton for two. LAX tried for a double suplex on KM who tossed them both over, and made the tag to Bahh once again.
The big man crushed them both with a running crossbody, before hitting a series of splashes. He stomped the ring making everyone shake and fall down, setting up both opponents for running hip attacks in the corner, in a really innovative spot that I don’t think I’ve seen from any other super heavyweight. A little miscommunication saw KM accidentally knock his partner off the apron, and LAX immediately jumped on him. Lots of quick combinations, and LAX picked up a win with a Fameasser and Lionsault combo.
— Heather Monroe is interviewed about making her debut later tonight. She calls herself the goddess of girl power. Keira Hogan shows up and warns Heather that Su Yung is twisted and demented, telling her to stay the hell away from her.
— LAX celebrate their victory backstage. Santana asks where the OGz have been lately, and Konnan says they ran them off the streets, and after what the Lucha Bros did to them we’ll never see them in the ring again either. They talk about wanting to defend the titles and debate about offering Pentagon and Fenix a shot to “keep it in the family”, but Konnan says it’s not the right time…
— This week’s GWN Flashback Moment of the Week is the insane street fight between LAX and OVE from Bound for Glory 2017. In case you forgot, there was a powerbomb off the ramp through a table, and Santana at one point dove off the scaffolding.
— The Desi Hit Squad did a weird promo talking about how much they love Indian food. They promised to “ruin Thanksgiving” next week.
Eli Drake came down to the ring, but before he could really get rolling, the innovator of violence Tommy Dreamer cut him off. Drake mocked the fat out-of-shape fans, and said old, lazy hardcore wrestlers like Dreamer are what’s ruining the business today.
Dreamer cut a passionate promo about Konnan breaking his hip for the business, introducing Eddie Guerrero to ECW, and guys like Rey Mysterio, Psychosis, Juve Guerrero, Sabu and Mick Foley for reinventing the business. He said all wrestlers were hardcore, and the fans who have all made them stars are hardcore, and Eli Drake mocking “hardcore” means he’s taking a shot at them, too.
Drake sarcastically clapped, and said Dreamer is jealous because he knows he can’t hold a candle to him on the microphone. Dreamer said he done talking and asked for a fight, right here and now. The two started taking off jackets and got ready to brawl, but Drake took a powder to the outside and walked off.
— Moose is backstage chilling on a couch with some random woman. Alisha Edwards walks in and tells Moose that Eddie is on his way to the arena, and when he shows up Moose better not be here, because she has no idea what he’s capable of anymore.
— A bunch of referees are shown backstage talking about how Impact has becoming an “unsafe working environment”. They talk about what they should do about it, but Scarlett Bordeaux walked in and started flirting with all of them. The young ref who looks like he’s 13 ran away immediately. She’s basically flirting with the referees trying to get them in her pocket. Or…whatever the equivalent is to pockets when you wear the kinds of things Scarlett does…
JOHNNY IMPACT vs. MATT SYDAL (w/ Ethan Page)
Johnny won a competitive, back-and-forth match with Starship Pain. We’re assuming. In reality, our power went out for about five minutes. Apologies, there has been about six inches of surprise snow fall and apparently the lines weren’t ready for it. I came back to Impact hitting his finisher.
Winner: Johnny Impact
— Killer Kross came out after the match and said he had some things to say, and he needs Johnny to listen with an open mind. He said when he got into the business he thought he would be the catalyst for change, but the reality is that he lost to Johnny fair and square. That means he has to entertain the notion that he is not this great catalyst for change after all, but perhaps the champion might be. Kross said if change won’t happen by his hands, he’ll make sure that it does by Johnny’s hands, calling him a “role model” unlike himself. He said champions don’t have friends because everyone backstage wants to come for the title — except him. Kross promised that when Johnny needs assistance, and he will eventually, just say the word and he’ll be there. He tried to shake hands but Impact grabbed the microphone and said he couldn’t trust Kross, and he doesn’t want him anywhere near him, or his wife, or even his dog.
— Jordynne Grace was shown working out backstage while Katarina annoyingly tried to talk her into teaming up. She admitted she lost last week, but claimed “on any other night” she would have won the match. Grace told her she had two weeks to prove it.
— Eddie Edwards attacked Moose backstage, but he was ambushed by a group of people in what looked like blue hospital gowns, who carried him off. Commentary explained that Alisha “made the right decision” and that Eddie would finally get the help that he needs.
SU YUNG vs. HEATHER MONROE
Yung completely dominated her opponent, wasting very little time beating her all around the ring and dropping her with a nasty neckbreaker off the second rope. She pulled out the blood-soaked rag but Monroe fought back with forearms in the corner, followed by an unnecessary handspring splash. She hit a spinning kick to the side of the head and a knee to the back of the head, but only got a two-count. Yung ducked another spin kick and connected with a palm strike, into the Kill Switch. She could have easily pinned her, but instead applied the Mandible Claw for the submission.
Winner: Su Yung
— After the match, Keira Hogan came out to save the newcomer Heather Monroe. She cleared the ring, but the lights went out and Allie appeared, dressed in all black with her face painted up. Yung attacked Hogan from behind, and the two left together arm-in-arm.
X-DIVISION CHAMPIONSHIP MATCH
BRIAN CAGE (c) vs. SAMI CALLIHAN (w/ OVE)
Sami went right after the big man and they brawled to the floor to get things started. After both Crist brothers tried (and succeeded) in distracting Cage, the referee wasted little time in ejecting them BOTH from ringside. Sami flew off the apron but got caught out of the air into a big delayed suplex on the floor.
Apparently a TON of stuff happened during the commercial break, as they showed Callihan hitting a piledriver on the apron, slamming Cage through the barricade, and working over his knee in the Stretch Muffler — none of it was enough to put him away. Cage hit a step-up enzuigiri in the corner and the two fought up the ropes. Callihan caught him and ran across the ring, nearly killing Cage with a Death Valley Driver into the bottom turnbuckle. OUCH!
We come back from another commercial and the champion hit a Falcon Arrow, but it wasn’t enough. He hoisted up Callihan and dropped him with an F5, but somehow it STILL wasn’t enough as he got his foot on the bottom rope. Callihan took a cheap shot to the eyes and connected with a Foley-style piledriver, but the champion kicked out at two-and-three-quarters. The two fought back and forth, trading blows, kicking out of everything, until finally Cage hit the Drill Claw to retain.
Winner and Still Impact Wrestling X-Division Champion: Brian Cage
— Cage announces that he is cashing in the X-Division Championship, exercising “Option C” for the first time in years. He lays the title down in the ring, and says he’s coming for the Impact World Championship on 1/6 at Impact Homecoming.