Impact Wrestling Results (11/12): X-Division Scramble, The North Defends, Tessa Battles oVe & More


We get a ridiculous video package looking back at Joey Ryan dick-flipping Ken Shamrock last week. It is as intentionally over-the-top dramatic as a video about a man flipping another man with his penis can be.


Tessa doesn’t bother with an entrance and just sprints to the ring, going right after the champion. Fulton tosses both opponents around but they’re able to work together to topple him with a big DDT. Tessa and Sami face off and go back and forth with right hands. Callihan clocked her with a nasty knee strike and hit a package brainbuster, damn near killing her for two-and-a-half.

Swann gets the hot tag after a beat, and clears the ring with a series of lariats and splashes on both guys. Sami eats an enzuigiri in the corner, but Fulton blindsides him from behind. The two-on-one assault from oVe begins now, as they tag in and out with quick tags, picking Swann apart. He tries to come back with a few good right hooks to the champ, but Fulton was once again there to clobber him. At one point the lunatic was just standing on Rich’s face in the corner.

This beatdown goes on forever. It’s like five straight minutes of them destroying Swann. The crowd starts chanting “Sami Fears Tessa” because they clearly don’t want her anywhere near the ring. Tessa does eventually get the hot tag, several headlocks later. She manages to lift up Callihan for a Samoan Drop, then uses the ropes to take down Fulton with a DDT. Madman gets a cutter before Tessa climbs to the top rope, but Sami caught her out of the air and threw her into a big boot from Fulton. The big man scooped her up and delivered a RIDICULOUS running powerslam, but Swann breaks it up.

Swann manages to get Fulton over the ropes and squashes Sami with a huge splash in the corner. Tessa recovers and does a suicide dive, Fulton catches her, but Swann with a dive to help take him down. Superkick to the champ! Callihan digs both his thumbs into his opponent’s eyes, and grabs his baseball bat. He apparently does not care about this match at all. The ref takes the bat, and instead Sami uses the world title to blast Swann in the face. Game over.

Winner: Sami Callihan & Madman Fulton

After the match oVe continued to beat down Rich Swann. Sami blasted him with the title belt a second time. Tessa tried to make the save but the numbers game was just too much, and she too took the title belt upside the head. Hold up – Brian Cage is here! Cage rushes the ring and immediately drops Madman Fulton with an F5. Callihan bails from the ring and the two stare each other down as he flees up the ramp to safety.


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