ROH Global Wars: Chicago
October 15, 2017
Coverage by Mike Killam for ProWrestling.com
– ROH World Champion Cody Rhodes kicked off the show because he had a bone to pick with a certain “superstar” whose name he wasn’t allowed to say on live PPV. He read Roman Reigns’ tweet from earlier in the day and said all this time he thought the lame tactical vest was just to hide his pot belly and a string of failed drug tests, but it turns out it was just hiding envy all along. Cody tried to get Cary Silkin to kiss his ring, then brought a fan wearing an American Nightmare shirt into the ring. The fan turned out to be Dalton Castle, who sent him running.
(1) Silas Young & Beer City Bruiser def. Chuck Taylor & Trent Barreta. Really fun opening match with Young becoming increasingly frustrated by the bromance of the Best Friends and their antics. Bruiser made fun of Trent joining the NJPW heavyweight division because he couldn’t knock him over. Bruiser actually had a lot of big spots and went over really well here. Silas pinned Chuckie T with Misery after Bruiser hit him with the beer keg.
(2) Marty Scurll def. Hiromu Takahashi. Daryl was ridiculously over, more so than almost anyone else on the show. The crowd was split between the two 50/50 throughout. They started hot and ended hotter, working up to an excellent exchange of nearfalls at the end. Hiromu hit the Timebomb but it wasn’t enough. He reversed one Chicken Wing and hit a superkick, but ended up tapping to the second Chicken Wing. There were several spots with Daryl including Scurll doing his broken fingers move to the stuffed animal, which got a huge “you sick f—” chant.
(3) The Addiction def. Kushida & Cheeseburger. The babyfaces got the advantage early before the ref could get things under control, but that quickly changed. Addiction dominated throughout and cut off Kushida from making the tag or getting any momentum going. Daniels and Kazarian hit him with Celebrity Rehab, then destroyed Cheeseburger with the Best Meltzer Ever for the win.
– The Addiction pulled out a table after the match but Bully Ray came running out to make the save. Kaz took a chokeslam through the table and the good guys celebrated together before leaving Bully alone in the ring to say goodbye to Chicago. He said that it was “about that time” and the crowd chanted “NO NO NO” of course. Bully said he had to put his medical health first leading to a long, emotional standing ovation. He then brought a young boy into the ring and gave him a piece of the table, saying it was the last table that he would ever break.
(4) The Young Bucks, Cody Rhodes & Hangman Page def. Motor City Machine Guns, Jay White & Jonathan Gresham. Insane match, as you would expect. The crowd was ridiculously hot for Bullet Club with loud “too sweet”, “one sweet” and “cease-desist” chants early on. When Cody did the “FTR” spot I thought my speakers were going to blow. Motor City played heels for the night and fully embraced it since there’s no way they were getting over on Bullet Club in Chicago. Some comedy early with everyone trying for elbow drops but literally none of them connecting. They did a big eight-man dropkick spot. Plenty of high spots, dives and great heel work from the ROH tag champs. At one point all four Bullet Club guys had Sharpshooters on at the same time. Gresham took the Shooting Star Meltzer Driver and a Right of Passage from Hangman to end it.
(5) The Dawgs def. One Mean Team. This was a quick ice breaker after intermission. Rhett Titus basically cleaned house and took everyone to school. Ferrara looked pretty good as well.
– Jay Briscoe came out and beat up One Mean Team after their match. He cut a promo about his brother being injured, and blamed Mark for getting distracted and focussing on things like the ROH TV title and the six-man belts instead of focussing on what really matters: The Briscoes.
(6) Minoru Suzuki & Killer Elite Squad def. Jay Lethal, Kenny King & Shane Taylor. Another great match. Suzuki looked like a killer and Lethal kept trying to man up to him, only to get destroyed time and time again. At one point Minoru was laughing at him while demanding to be chopped half a dozen times. Taylor looked great and took out everyone at the end. The story at the end was Minoru trying and failing to get the 300-plus Taylor up for the Gotch-style piledriver but not being able to lift him. After a great back and forth he put on the sleeper and faded him out, then hit the piledriver and actually held him in the air for ten seconds before connecting.
(7) Colt Cabana def. Toru Yano. This was the comedy match of all comedy matches. Basically the story was that Cabana was the American Yano and had all of his spots and shenanigans scouted. Yano would go for one of his famous moves and then get really mad because Colt wouldn’t sell it for him. They both had DVDs, they both went for turnbuckles, they both used the ref to try to hit low blows, etc. It was excellent. At the end Yano tied up his opponent’s arms, but Cabana still did his signature pin to win it.
(8) Will Ospreay def. Flip Gordon. The best match of the night depending on who you ask. This was on the level of the Ospreay/Ricochet matches, but Flip was doing things that either of them had never even dreamed of trying. At one point his jumped from one set of ropes to another, into a springboard corkscrew moonsault on the outside while turning around in midair. Great storytelling with Ospreay in total control at the start, getting cocky being the IWGP champ and the best flyer in the world, and Flip slowly getting better over the course of the match showing that he can hang. Gordon hit a crazy corkscrew version of the Oscutter. Will came back with a flurry of offense and hit the real Oscutter to win.
(9) Kenny Omega (c) def. Yoshi-Hashi to retain the IWGP U.S. Heavyweight Championship. Another very good match, but sort of a combination of the standard NJPW main event layout and the crazy ROH style with all the run-ins and shenanigans. Yoshi-Hashi looked great and tried really hard to make this a great main event (which it was) but everyone knew he was there to lose and he never really got over. All the Bullet Club members came out, as did members of Chaos plus Flip Gordon and Chuck Taylor. The ref went down leading to an all-out war. Toru Yano, Will Ospreay – everyone was out there. Omega won after two One Winged Angels.
– Cody Rhodes said that wrestling was cool again, and asked the fans if they remember the mid-90s. He introduced Kenny Omega as the man who was carrying NJPW on his back. Omega thanked all the fans and put over how much merch was sold on this tour. He said that Yoshi-Hashi tried really hard, but he’s nothing more than a try-hard and couldn’t get the job done. The Young Bucks wanted to take a Bullet Club selfie but none of them had a phone or camera on them, so they asked the fans if they could borrow one. They looked over and there was….JIMMY JACOBS! The recently fired WWE creative writer took the photo with Bullet Club (again) as the crowd chanted his name. They closed out the show with one last ridiculously loud “F— The Revival” chant that threatened to bring down the building it was so loud.